allen didnt come home as planned. emily called me bawling her eyes out on the phone. kids are acting up cus they miss their dad and were expecting him, this morning. now he wont be back till tommoorow morning....
and i havent had a chance to talk
emily now knows why i needed to talk. she said "u arent breaking up w/ him are you? cus he wont be able to handle that' and i was so tired i let it slip "well no, i'll be asking us to take a break. then i can still be his friend, u guys work on you and i'll be his friend...and maybe later date again"
i feel sick.
very sick
and i wish he'd hurry home so ic an get this overwith....and so emily cld have allen home and feel bttr and work ont heir relationship.
I am so po'ed....he actually emails her at like noon or so and asked if he cld stay longer... when he was already supposed to be home! He prob fell asleep and woke up late....he actually expected her to drop off the rental car this morning.... sure thing good lookin....if she did that she'd be w/out the car for a day and has 2 kids! its different when he's only a phone call away, but 14hrs away.... no. so not only are the kids acting up cus he's not home today as promised, not only is emily upset cus she was so happy last night he'd be home in the morning, but on top of that i have to wait to talk annnnnd they have to pay an extra day for the rental car!
so here i am sitting the kids while emily mopes upstairs in bed..poor thing. and i suspect allen wanted to stay and extra day to try and de-stress sum more and to try and talk sum more to his friend who introduced polyamoury to them and to spend time w/ friends long since seen.....
i dunno. i just know i feel sick...
and tired...
and stressed...
and depressed....
and frustrated..
and sad.....
and just plain stupid!
hurry home allen....hurry home so i can get this dun and overwith....hurry home so u and emily can start working on you relationship....
hurry home
we all miss you
we all love you
i will still miss you, even when u are home....i feel my heart breaking allready
please dont blame emily allen... this is my idea....
she wants us to stay together.....i want u to fix u 2 b4 we 2 can continue.... i think u'll fight my decison... but its what is right....
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